ho ho ho

sometimes when, say, after a solid week of drug-fuelled clubbing, hot bruising kinky sex, hours of dancing and shmoozing, you may find yourself thinking bizarre thoughts…

swimming past the queue outside .heaven on monday, i was both shocked and horrified to realize that it was looking like it might be the busiest night ever. by the time atif, john, tye, brian, andrew and luke had congregated on the dancefloor, easily 1,000 punters had crammed their way into the club, at least 10% being all-to-familiar faces. it was not far removed from a screening of eric bogs, this is your life.

in bed this morning, i experienced a bit of half-conscious paranoia, thinking that maybe i had gotten amnesia, as i couldn’t remember any details about myself. then my heart started racing uncontrollably as i realized my grocery delivery would arrive any minute. then i snuggled up to a handsome duvet cover till 4pm.

dancing at .ghetto tonight to some entirely-too-hard-house, i realized that my grogginess, sloppy dress, unshaven look and general ambivalence was being perceived by the heaving crowd of wannabe-.heaven-.beyond-musclemaries as attractive desirability. these unprofessional clubkids [yay it's a holiday let's party like twats] took turns knocking me over, spilling drinks on me and otherwise flirting with me throughout the night. one of these annoying shoves frighteningly led to the discovery that there’s a painful lump in my left breast. can young healthy flat-chested men get breast cancer?

i’ve been just ever-so-slightly stressed the last few days, trying to coordinate new years plans between my nineteen groups of friends. i have flatmate mitch and his visitor derrick, atif and john [hates drugs and afterhours clubbing], .gregiño [hates .heaven], marky [hates .popstarz], tye and brian visiting from new york and christoper visiting from san diego [all three missing in action] along with a smattering of lesbians and cute boys for myself.

it’s almost [and i do say almost] annoying having too many options and too many connections. i can get all of us onto the guestlist, into the vip room, sort out the drugs, get the champagne regardless of where we go… but, because i’m the privleged one, it means that i have to do the running around, the shmoozing, the texting.

i wanna live like common people, i wanna see whatever common people see. i wanna buy our tickets last minute, queue in the cold with my friends, and have fun regardless of where we end up. but, i’m not complaining, i do consider myself very lucky to have the connections that i have with the lovely promoters/owners/bartenders/drag queens/cloakroom attendants/waiters/deejays across town.

have a splendid new year, and, for the love of god have some friggin fun for once, you sorry excuse for a fun-loving automaton! :twisted:

home is where the heart is

my first christmas away from family was ridiculously enjoyable. i should feel guilty for having ditched my indiana family to stay in london, but, erm, well, i don’t.

wednesday was both christmas eve and darian’s birthday… we met up with his boyf and friends at bar fusion in islington for a few [really quite embarassing piss-poor, actually] games of pool before heading back to theirs for a threesome some mulled wine and late-night teevee.

thursday woke up on christmas morning to open up prezzies with darian and boyf duncan. they made me feel very much at home, and i adored watching the two of them in marital bliss. we exchanged our prezzies, had some breakfast and then atif arrived to take me over to andrew’s.

spent all of christmas day with the boys—atif, andrew, mark and greg. it snowed [aherm] quite a bit, and we managed to polish off a case or two of champagne, whilst enjoying a nice meal [turkey with orange/cranberry stuffing], lovely prezzies and, of course, the queen’s speech.

my favorite gifts include the photo reprints from greg of different exciting moments over the past year… the worst one being eric in a pink cowboy hat from europride last year in manchester. i also loved the gadgets i got—one of those electrostatic globe things from atif, and some sorta artificial-intelligence thing from my sister kim that plugs into my usb port. it’s really bizarre, it talks to you and everything.

after a few hours of drinking games, gossip, dancing, sex in the city and self-medication, on christmas night atif rushed us across town to trade for an amazing 10 hours of dancin’ and prancin’. an absolutely amazing, very fun crowd… the only boys brave enough to drive to trade on christmas night are the ones who know how to party. lots of post-holiday couples, lots of orphans like myself who’ve chose to party with their tribe rather than subject themselves to family stress.

friday was boxing day, but that was no excuse. in a sneak preview of my february trip to sydney, i met up with greg, atif and the loverly lesbos angie and zoe for some fiction. once again, a very up-for-it crowd… lots of pilled out straight boys mixed in with the muscle marys and twinkalicious foreigners. i was hit on by, oh, i dunno, a dozen guys, dropping lines like you have perfect hair and you’re an amazing dancer will you teach me and are you from denmark and i love blonde boys. bless. i sent them all out to pasture, though, cuz i was in a dancing [rather than romancing] mood. oh, and i sorta kinda miss jack.