kudos to me.
new years eve has come and gone. at the stroke of midnight this year, i found myself in the middle of a splendidly busy club in london, with a smattering of old and new friends.
i have issues surrounding new years — turns out that i somehow always manage to be destitutely single on new years, without fail. this year was definitely no exception, with the latest mr. right parting ways a few days prior to december 31 — no hard feelings ã
i did my damnedest to arrange a date for the stroke of midnight — a recipient of the golden kiss. all day today i’ve been very anxious — not sure why — a combination of leftover jetlag, a bit of a midlife crisis i’m having with my career, and probably a bit too much going out the past few nights. i found myself a bit edgy, a bit jumpy, and a bit nervous all day today — this led me to worry about meeting up with my friends and also caused me to dread the stroke of midnight.
this social obligation of a midnight snog is loosely related to the obligation to pull someone when you go out to a club. a bit of competition, a bit of carpe diem, a bit of an ego test, and a bit of a sexual outlet, i usually succumb to the competitive game that is pulling a bloke at a club. bor-ing. lam-o.
tonight, though, i was quite pleased with myself. i had a most enjoyable evening, with a smile firmly planted on my noggin from 9pm when i left my flat till 6am (now) when i’ve returned. i had fun with my mates, had a few nice (romantic, cute, friendly) kisses at midnight, and enjoyed dancing my tits off till the breaka breaka dawn.
i think it’s quite sad that the only success meter that people attach to nights out is whether or not you’ve pulled someone. i hate to say this, but, apparently my standards are too high cuz in the several thousand people i saw tonight, only a small handful sparked my interest, and even then, upon a slight amount of observation there were big turnoffs.
funny — running into the french bloke and the german bloke. the french bloke says, “have you ever had a real french kiss?” (in retrospect he obviously uses that line a lot), and we kissed — i gave him a 9.5 out of 10, and he gave me a 10. then the german played the same game, and nearly chewed my face off… i’d give him a solid 8.
frightening — running into an old friend from the states who had a young boy in tow. upon further inspection, i noticed a lot of really young boys and a lot of older men in the vip lounge. hmm….
uplifting — leaving the club and having my cell phone fill up with friendly text messages and voicemails from friends around the globe. good to feel loved.
satisfying — to return home, to my london flat, and feeling good about myself, with no regrets for the evening, and no inkling of shame, sketchiness or opportunities lost.
2002 is off to a good start, regardless of what the circuit boys say.
