archive for March, 2001

underground

this is
bank
change here for
the central line
the bakerloo line
network southeast
and intercity rail services
this train terminates at
ealing broadway
please mind the closing doors

as much as i romanticize about london towne, each and every visit back not only conjures up (all misty-eyed) old larphs, but also builds to my overall ‘london experience’ with new memories.

i’m finding more and more now that i actually tend to enjoy public transportation… erm… commuting… sitting, with strangers, who i undoubtedly will never see again (unless some strange intervening force steps in).

on airplanes, it’s quite easy to remain anonymous for your whole journey — in-flight entertainment, noise-cancelling headphones, a little sleepy-sleep. in san francisco, almost all forms of muni (the metro, the busses) are either so crowded that you’re unpleasantly face-to-face with someone, or are empty enough that you just sit in your seat and stare at the back of someone else’s head.

the london underground, also known as “the tube”, is, for the most part, an exception to many subways i’ve seen. on most cars, long rows of seats line each side of the car, facing the center. so, as i board the picadilly, or bakerloo, or jubilee lines, i’ll sit with 5 people to my left, 5 to the right, with 11 sitting opposite me.

where do you look? where do you allow your eyes to rest? some lines (district, circle, and the aboveground part of the picadilly, for example) allow for somewhat scenic above-ground views. but, most lines provide no distant scenery to look at.

like most surfaces in society, advertisements are everywhere on the tube. the can provide a few minutes’ worth of entertainment, but, then it’s either time to (1) nod off, (2) read the newspaper, or… play the game.

it’s a fun game, and can really allow for some amusing journeys. what i do, more often than not, is pick out someone interesting — no, it *doesn’t* have to be that cute bloke at the end of the row that is probably… swishy. it could be that overtly pierced, but surprisingly shy punk rocker that got on at camden town station… or, it could be the german boy separated from the rest of his tourist family who are standing 15 feet away.

just glance. make eye contact. hold it.

note — this is different from staring. the goal is not to intimidate, or frighten… the goal is to connect. to, even if for just one moment, create a human-to-human relationship. rather than sharing a train with 85 ‘disposable’ images (of, therefore, ‘disposable’ people), you can create a lasting memory, a lasting connection.

is that creepy?

sure thing

i sit here, not even an hour until i land into sfo. i feel like a contestant on “let’s make a deal”.^. i’m nervously anticipating what’s going to be behind door number three. it could be a prince in his chariot, or it could be a burly man in a blue uniform.

i normally try to not fret over something that should’t be anything to fret about. this ‘prince’ and i met just a few weeks ago, and, to date, we’ve only hung out a few times. had a few conversations. only had one proper date, as far as i can recall. the problem, though, is that i can’t get him out of my mind.

puppy love. i can’t explain the way i feel any other way. maybe ‘mature’ puppy love is a better way of describing it? ‘adult’ puppy love? ‘reserved’ puppy love? i hate to distract, disclaim and prepend warnings (warnings directed internally to myself). i don’t want to scare myself, or him. i don’t want to rush things. i don’t want to take things too slowly. i want to make sure he knows how i feel, but i don’t want to dump too much intense emotion into his lap. we haven’t broached the committment conversation, but, over the past two weeks while i’ve been on holiday in the uk, i’ve been 110% innocent. not to say that i’m otherwise *not* 110% innocent, it’s just that this time around i’ve been consciously innocent.

good afternoon, ladies and gentlemen, we’ve begun our initial decent into the san francisco area…

well, i guess this is it. i’m not nervous per se, more anxious. silly me, silly me. i feels so good to feel silly. i spend too much time feeling adult, feeling professional, feeling not necessarily giddy. just wanted to document this moment.

in a short while, i’ll either be with my prince driving back in his chariot, or with in a supershuttle rejoicing in my freedom. today, that is.




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